Children's Funny Poems
By Josie Whitehead
A centipede went to a shop
To buy a set of shoes.
He woke the poor shoe salesman
From his pleasant morning snooze.
'Come on and serve me quickly
For I have no time to waste!'
The poor young man had such a shock
And dashed around in haste.
'Fifty pairs of shoes you want?
And all in the same style?'
The centipede sat comfortably
And watched him with a smile.
'A hundred shoes are what I need –
Yes, fifty for each side –
And bring a nice selection please,
To help me to decide.'
The salesman brought the boxes down,
And counted every one.
The centipede just sat and smirked.
He thought it was such fun.
He’d try them on, but then would say:
'These shoes are a poor fit,'
And: 'Do you have a smaller pair
For these shoes hurt a bit?'
The salesman thought: 'This is too much' -
Yet still he tried to please.
The centipede enjoyed his day
And did his best to tease.
You couldn’t see across the shop
For boxes piled in heaps,
But then the young man woke at last
From his most distressing sleep.
He’d had an awful nightmare
Which had made him want to scream.
How glad he was to realize
It only was a dream.
Copyright on all my poems
* This was one of almost 400 poems chosen by teachers and children in schools right across West Yorkshire in 2010 and was published in one of the 5 books published at that time. (AMS Educational - Funny Poems). Sorry but it is out of print at the moment. Josie